Hello my lovely badasses,
#newyearnewview has been created in 2015 by none other than the amazing Virgie Tovar. Check it out if you want. It’s basically a guide to curating your social media in order to be more inclusive and diverse, which is always a good thing.
But I digress. Hi, Hey, It has been a while since we last met here. I know I know. I was busy doing other stuff, more important stuff admittedly, like trying to write that damned master thesis.
But it‘s a new year now and I‘m ready for my very own little cleanse in my life. Don‘t worry, it has nothing to do with juice or eating less in fact I won‘t change nothing in my nutrition at all. Okay well nothing is not entirely true.
I have been eating out waaaaay too often last year and while it brings me joy and alleviates a great deal of stress in my life, I need to make smart choices when it comes to money. So what I will do nutrition-wise is, to cook more at home and and prepare bento boxes.
 Bento Boxes are Japanese lunch boxes. If you need a cookbook check out http://justbento.com/ [don’t get cought up in the whole “healthy” language there.] For more inspiration www.casabento.com www.iloveobento.com www.laptoplunches.com www.lunchbots.com www.monbento.com
I also want to deal with leftovers in a smart way and try being okay with throwing away food I don’t want to eat anymore or giving said food away to neighbors or ppl in need. Berlin is known for its excellent anti-foodwaste community programs. there are even Apps (like Too good to go for instance) for that. So I should be all set in no time 🙂
Cook more at home and eat out less or make it more «special» like once a month or week (date night). Prepare more delicious bento boxes and deal with leftovers in a smart, sustainable and community building way.
Almost done with this one. Phew! That feels great already. « So how about this cleanse? » you might ask. Fear not dear friend, I’m about to give you 100% of the new year’s resolution drive, sense of accomplishment and productivity with exactly 0% of the diet talk. Zit. Zero. Nada. Niente.
Granted, for me it’s easier. I just say « keep up with the good work, Dot“ And that’s it. But what do I do? Well, in a nutshell, I do intuitive eating and health at every size. I joined a gym in September and have been going more or less regularly since November. They have a women’s section, which is great because the machines are smaller and better catered towards my small body (I’m 5“3 /160cm tall). And there’s no explicit diet talk although it’s a mainstream gym. It’s not perfect by any means but I noticed that I have to move my body more in order to have less back pain. And that’s just what I’m willing to do. I also have some dance classes left I already payed for at a local bodypositive (not really fat-positive though *sigh*) burlesque, exotic and pole dance studio left, and I want to get into salsa dancing again. So, joy of movement and doing something for my back and shoulders all the way. Bonus: the gym has a pole in the women’s area. If I take a pole dancing class, I have a place to practice now. So nothing is holding me back in that depardment anymore. Notice how there’s still no talk of diets in here? Maybe take a moment to appreciate this while reading. Letting out a gentle sigh of relief. Aaaah. Now let’s put that on the list, shall we?
Keep up the good work in the intuitive eating and health at every size department! Meaning find more pleasurable ways to move your body regularly and check in with your body’s needs and requirements regularly as well. Take good care of yourself from a loving and caring position full of compassion and DON’T BE UPSET IF YOU DON’T DO EVERYTHING PERFECTLY ALL THE TIME.
(image source: ravelist)
My personal mantra for this year is PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION anyway. I guess that says a lot.
I can tell you that I have looked for help with the masters thesis and I’m doing better in that department too. However I don‘t feel so comfortable talking much about this. So for the purpose of mentioning it here, I will put « keep up with the good work in that department » in here. Just so you know. 😉
(image source: bodyposi panda)
Finally the „cleanse“ I promised you:
(image source: readersdigest.co.uk)
3. Do a wardrobe cleanse. But do it joyfully.
Take a rainy or otherwise dull afternoon and do a personal fashion show with all your seasonal clothes! Jep. You heard me. First make a playlist of empowering songs and rock the shit out of your favorite outfits. Maybe put two or three key pieces out and hang them next to your mirror or at a door visible and out and ready for you to admire. This is key because I’m well aware that this process is going to get emotional soon (maybe have a box of tissues at hand).
So I want you to keep these anchor pieces right there if you feel the need to slip into them and lift your mood up again. Maybe grab yourself some nice coffee, tea, water or other nice beverage and something you like to munch on. And now’s the perfect time to go to the toilet if you need to. This is going to take a while. All set?
Let’s queue the FAQ:
- What if you really like the piece and it doesn’t fit anymore? You always have the option of having it altered by a professional and get it tailored to YOUR body. Why the stress on your body? It’s simple, really. This piece is most likely bought off the rack. Meaning it has not been altered to fit you specifically. You got lucky with it and it happened to fit your former body but now it doesn’t . Doesn’t matter if it is illfitting all over or just in some areas. The rule is: if you love it enough that you’re willing to pay to have it tailored or altered, then by all means keep it and do so! Those are the precious pieces. They have sentimental value and most often are better quality attire than the rest. They deserve to be lifelong companions. And with all comitted relationships, you need to change yourself and the other one in order to happily stay together for a long time. And sometimes the other has to seek professional help ; by a seemstress or tailor or even better put, a sewing person of your choosing.
- What if it’s illfitting all over and you’re not that attatched to it? There’s two options here. Does it have holes in it? Is it torn? Is is beyond wearable and beyond saving with cute patches or other upcycling hacks? If so, TOSS IT. Dont even look back. It is dead, Jim. Take your time to mourn your loss. Gather your thoughts and move on. The other option, if it’s not beyond saving (including upcycling) is to donate it to charity or organize a clothing swap! We have them more or less regularly in Berlin. But I want to stress here that this is a community building event. This next message goes out to all my conventionally sized, straight, white, cis gendered able bodied and financially independent readers. Unless you’re an ally to your friends, please don’t continue reading the next part. Whether you’re queer, femme, butch, androgynuos or non-binary ; fat, plus size, curvy, chunky or however you like to describe your « deviant » marginalized body, this is the chance for you to make a clothing swap for YOUR community. And I have left religious belief system out of the equation because that’s a different layer, ok? That’s meta. I want to focus on bodies and the need for community building. I bet if you really wanted, you could attent a church organized clothing swap easily (or organize one in a jiffy). That’s not the community building I want to talk about here. That’s for a different blog.
- What if you used to wear it and it still fits but you’re just tired of it? If it doesn’t match your style, see above. If it does you might want to keep it stored somewhere but not completely out of sight. Or you donate it to charity or put it in a swap. Your choice.
That’s about it regarding the wardrobe cleanse. But what about other parts of our lives ? I’m going to adress something I personally struggle with a lot and have struggled with recently. It’s a fresh emotional wound so bear with me, please. *deep breath* I want to do a friendship cleanse. I mean it already happened at the end of the year for me anyway but it wasnt deliberate or by my own choosing with one exception. I got rid of a toxic person in my life and I don’t miss them one single bit. What I was refering to is, I have been dumped by some people I considered friends or at least acquaintances with the potential of becoming friends (I’m still new in town). So I’m left with the « rest ». It feels strange and really scary to do it but I want to have a look at who’s left. Assess the situation and do the same with the clothes just on a more complex level with people. Maybe keep them all stored in my heart until I have decided what to do with them ? But I do want to get rid of the toxic ones straight away and leave them behind asap. They have dragged me down and I can’t have that anymore. „But what about the ones you love and they have just some toxic behaviors but otherwise treat you well?“ a small voice in my head says. « Well Dot, have you not looked at your own writing ? You know what to do. » Take the lifelong companions to a professional who can help them. Friends and partners alike…
Greetings from Berlin, Germany and a happy new year to you.